Bodily Harm
i don't think "you've grown fat" is a perfectly acceptable opening line to a conversation. specially with someone you've never seen in a long while. it just reminds you why you conveniently deleted their numbers from your phone.
they quickly add... "you really should get into shape dear!" have they ever thought that "round" IS a SHAPE?
then again, my theory is that the "other" person pulls out the heavyweight (pun intended u-huh) question so you can't use the same attack. it's all psycho-warfare you see.
what about naturally thin people, uh.. i think that was an oxymoron, natural and thin just doesn't go together. hypothetically, they should get off easily in this slim and thin obsessed culture.
man was i wrong. (click on read more to continue...)
a friend came to me to confess that she thinks herself too thin. u-huh, another vain attempt to solicit a compliment. apparently, conversation openers with her long-time-thank-god-i-don't-see-you-that-often friends are usually "you're too thin!" and quickly followed by "you should eat more!"
i have friends who would KILL to hear that. but not for my poor friend who is seriously bordering on neuroses believing that she is ugly-thin.
her attempts at comebacks to such attacks are so lame, yeah like "gabby concepcion" making a comeback. not successful.
she grins, bears the insult and pretend that they really have her best interest. many times she tried to stuff her mouth in their presence only to hear them quip: "she only eats that way when in front of us, she doesn't eat at home."
before giving her any advice, i simply asked her: "did you ever notice that person is probably overweight?"
quiet. for a quick second. "u-huh?"
"you see dear, it is called reverse psychology. they attack you so you won't be able to tell them... my, you've grown fat."
a sparkle in her eyes. "hmmmm..."
"next time they say that to you, you tell them... yeah, and you've grown fat!"
hesitation. "but i can't do that! that's being rude."
"they started it dear. you're just finishing it. when they tell you to eat more, they secretly wish that THEY can eat more. now, does your husband complain about your weight?"
"no..."
"so what right does others have to complain about yours? do you feel healthy? you eat anything you want? is your husband healthy? am sure your husband's opinion matters more? you can buy dresses off the hangers in shops? you still get discounts from the teen section?" all this was answered with a yes.
smile. nod. happy happy. she walked away a little bit happier with herself. wait till she sees the bill for the psychiatric session.
the psyche is a delicate thing. we do so many things that harm our bodies but we've never thought that sometimes, bodily harm is the least of our worries. there are some unbelievably insecure people out there. don't let them get to you. there are well-meaning friends, unfortunately they sometimes carry baggage. you don't need to carry theirs, we have our own backpack to lug around.
they quickly add... "you really should get into shape dear!" have they ever thought that "round" IS a SHAPE?
then again, my theory is that the "other" person pulls out the heavyweight (pun intended u-huh) question so you can't use the same attack. it's all psycho-warfare you see.
what about naturally thin people, uh.. i think that was an oxymoron, natural and thin just doesn't go together. hypothetically, they should get off easily in this slim and thin obsessed culture.
man was i wrong. (click on read more to continue...)
a friend came to me to confess that she thinks herself too thin. u-huh, another vain attempt to solicit a compliment. apparently, conversation openers with her long-time-thank-god-i-don't-see-you-that-often friends are usually "you're too thin!" and quickly followed by "you should eat more!"
i have friends who would KILL to hear that. but not for my poor friend who is seriously bordering on neuroses believing that she is ugly-thin.
her attempts at comebacks to such attacks are so lame, yeah like "gabby concepcion" making a comeback. not successful.
she grins, bears the insult and pretend that they really have her best interest. many times she tried to stuff her mouth in their presence only to hear them quip: "she only eats that way when in front of us, she doesn't eat at home."
before giving her any advice, i simply asked her: "did you ever notice that person is probably overweight?"
quiet. for a quick second. "u-huh?"
"you see dear, it is called reverse psychology. they attack you so you won't be able to tell them... my, you've grown fat."
a sparkle in her eyes. "hmmmm..."
"next time they say that to you, you tell them... yeah, and you've grown fat!"
hesitation. "but i can't do that! that's being rude."
"they started it dear. you're just finishing it. when they tell you to eat more, they secretly wish that THEY can eat more. now, does your husband complain about your weight?"
"no..."
"so what right does others have to complain about yours? do you feel healthy? you eat anything you want? is your husband healthy? am sure your husband's opinion matters more? you can buy dresses off the hangers in shops? you still get discounts from the teen section?" all this was answered with a yes.
smile. nod. happy happy. she walked away a little bit happier with herself. wait till she sees the bill for the psychiatric session.
the psyche is a delicate thing. we do so many things that harm our bodies but we've never thought that sometimes, bodily harm is the least of our worries. there are some unbelievably insecure people out there. don't let them get to you. there are well-meaning friends, unfortunately they sometimes carry baggage. you don't need to carry theirs, we have our own backpack to lug around.
Comments