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Showing posts from May, 2007

It's Elementary My Dear Watson

Comprehension is critical in performing the most basic and common tasks. There are people though that seem to have little common sense. If you have a new device, the most common thing to do is to first read the manual - otherwise, you'd end up using the calculator as a mobile phone.

Oh wait, most americans do that.

Start

Subashana says:
hi
Subashana says:
u there
Subashana says:
need some help
Cacho says:
hi suba, what's up?
Subashana says:
hey its like this.
Subashana says:
I have a HP Pocket PC 5500
Subashana says:
its only a pocket PC. but i need the mobile also in it
Subashana says:
what can I do about this
Subashana says:
i PAQ HP Pocket PC 5500
Cacho says:
who is the service provider?
Subashana says:
HP
Subashana says:
I got this as a gift
Cacho says:
oh is that it, you would have to configure the mobile settings with a local mobile provider.
Subashana says:
but this is not a mobile I think
Cacho says:
they would be the best group to provide support as they would know the settings
Subashana says:
it says…

John 8:2-11

"He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her."

As it is, the politicians are throwing and hurling stones, bullets, accusations as to who cheated in the most recent elections. Opposition is raising hell for getting 12-0 votes in certain areas but are surprisingly mum on places where the administration got nothing. Recently, the administration filed 120 counts of cheating versus the opposition.

In the same situation where the Pharisees are pressing the Lord to condemn a sinner, He remained quiet and asked "He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her."

I do not believe that this election has more cheating, violation of election rules, more vote buying, more body count than the previous ones. The only difference is the media coverage and hype accorded to this comedy.

The Philippines is truly a country of democracy - where people are free to say what they want, what we lack is political maturity and integrity.

The Filipino peo…

Unfulfilled Expectations

inday was reminiscing about her last day as a post graduate intern in manila. she decided to spend it with a couple of other interns getting drunk in manila bay and wait for the sunrise.

big mistake, first of all there's a city ordinance banning liquor in manila bay so they all ended up getting frisked for id. second, they were sitting expectantly for the sun to rise and give hope to a new day, and they kept waiting, and waiting, and waiting until around six in the morning.

manila bay is known for its famous SUNSET.

ps

can't blame inday, she's not from manila and the other interns she was sharing a lonely bottle of vodka are true blue manilenyo (bred and fed in manila). i can't believe they finished ten years of medical school.

judgement day (english version)

Overheard in the gym, two ladies talking:

A: if he loses a couple of pounds that guy would be handsome.

B: you always see the diamond in the rough, i only see charcoal.

if words can kill, they can be charged with homicide. miaaaaow.

judgement day (tagalog bersyon)

there are certain conversations that can't be translated into english as they lose the acerbic wit associated with the local language. overheard in the gym, two ladies talking:

A: "alam mo, pag pumayat yan gwapo yan... tingnan mo."

B: "you always see the diamond in the rough, ako, puro uling ang nakikita ko."

if words can kill, that guy just got massacred. miaaaaaooooowww...

Senate Idol

I am going to resign if any of those crooks running for senate wins in this election as some sort of electoral protest.
- Miriam Defensor

these are not the actual words, but that's the gist of Miriam's message to Ted Failon and Korina Sanchez when she was interviewed on TV together with Gilbert Remulla as part of the info-campaign for the May 2007 elections.

They are crooks who has violated the electoral policies on maximum spending for the elections. (hmmm true)

dapat palitan nila ang panukala sa saligang batas tungkol sa kwalipikasyon ng isang presidente... kung ang pulis nga kailangan college gradweyt eto pang presidente na literate lang pwede na? kung sino na lang gago pala pwedeng tumakbo. (makes mad sense)

translate: they should change the constitution regarding the qualification of the president. if the police need to have a college degree, what more the president that they only need someone who is literate? any fool can run for president.

when asked about the performance of…

A Bark Worse than the Bite

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A few months ago, Senator Miriam Defensor went on the warpath when she was excluded from the shortlist of Supreme Court Chief Justice. I'd rather that you hear it from the horse's mouth (pun not intended), click on this link Miriam Defensor to view the video in YouTube.


For those who want to read the transcript of her speech, here goes:

i am foaming at the mouth!

i am hitting the roof!

i am homicidal!

i am suicidal!

i am ballistic!

bago sila magmeyting kinumbinsi na sila ng tsip jastis panganiban na yan na bata ni senator jovito salonga na anti gloria arroyo na wag nila akong inominate dahil takot sila na dahil sa sinasabi nilang malapit ako sa presidenteng arroyo at baka ma nominate ako as chief justice at ayaw na ayaw yan ni salonga dahil kalaban nya si arroyo eh bakit gawin nyang personal eto...

gusto ko na mangangagat ng tao!

Indelible Ink

It is the day after elections and I find myself grabbing my usual lunch in my favorite karinderya at the back of Holiday Spa.

I can't help but stare at the fingers of the cook who had seven (i counted) fingers stained black. I wanted to believe that she was clumsy enough to have caught all her fingers in a door jam and killed off all her fingernails, but really now, that's ridiculous.

I thought, how could she have gotten away with that in the voting precinct?

She turned to me and said, "Dili pa luto ang adobong nokos ser."

To those who prefer it in english, "The squid cooked in its own ink is not yet cooked."

Oh hell, indelible sounds like edible anyways.

Tourist Information

my friend Shehan Fernando sent me this note from Sri Lanka and I am not sure if this is real. On the other hand, this is just too hilarious to pass up and I am sharing this.

Enjoy!

The questions below about Sri Lanka, are from potential visitors. They were posted on a Sri Lankan Tourism Website and the answers are the actual responses by the website officials, who obviously have a sense of humour.

Q: Does it ever get windy in Sri Lanka? I have never seen it rain in Sri Lanka on TV, how do the plants grow? (UK).
A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them die.

Q: Will I be able to see wild elephants on the streets? (USA)
A: Depends how much you've been drinking.

Q: I want to walk from Colomboto Matara - can I follow the railroad tracks? (Sweden)
A: Sure, it's only hundred miles, take lots of water.

Q: Is it safe to run around Wanni in Sri Lanka? (Ireland)
A: So it's true what they say about the Irish.

Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in Sri Lanka…

What's So Happy With Mother's Day?

i got a couple of text messages today reminding me that it is mother’s day.

first of all, i am not aware that the male of our specie can bear children. the anus is not that big. second, my mother is dead. how cruel can that be?

reality is, my mother is truly happy as she is basking in the glory of our Lord and celebrating with the Mother of Mothers in heaven. i can't say the same for a lot of mothers who has to stay up worrying until their daughters come home, or wait anxiously as the husband seem to have conveniently forgotten to let her know his whereabouts.

celebrating mother's day mean that they have to wake up much earlier so they can cook breakfast, push the kids off the bed, make up the beds, wash the plates from last night, squeeze herself in the bathroom to take a quick shower, slab on some make-up, dab a bit of perfume, put on a nice dress and quickly jump back in the bed just before the husband wakes up - with the hope that he will say "you look lovely today, ha…

Cast of Characters

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they say meeting people is never coincidental, there is a reason for every encounter and your life is enriched or made a little bit sadder by each and every meeting. in this stage called earth, and the comedy called life i had the chance to meet characters that made this particualr chapter a happy one.

some offer young exuberant innocence whereas some offer the laid back attitude of a person fulfilled. memories have a nasty habit of fading and names forgotten, this is my way of making sure this chapter never fades.

cheers to everyone and as a dear friend of mine said, we never say goodbye - we say... until next time.

the cast of characters starting from the upper left:

enzo - i suspect he is taking uppers with his endless questions. he was the only one who was up early in the morning running around looking for me.

inday - dare i say the real name? in this paradise she blossomed freely

myka - if peter pan was a girl..

victor - dating boyfriend ni gina de venecia he he he. he's the best ho…

Lakawon - The Resort

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in response to those who asked for more details about the resort, am posting more pictures for reference. contact details of the place are included at the end of the post...





no one has ever described how heaven looks like. if you do find the words, let me know so i can update this post. a picture paints a thousand words, lakawon is priceless.
Lakawon Resort
Location: Cadiz Viejo, Cadiz City, Negros Occidental
Time of Travel: From Bacolod to Cadiz Viejo, 1 hour and 30 minutes
Mode of Transportation: Private and Public Vehicles
Facilities: Non-Aircon and Aircon Cottages, Tables and four chairs, Nipa Hut w/ Papag
Contact Nos. Tel: (034) 433-0808 / 434-7737
Look for Josie and Victor Puey

Lakawon - A Picture Story

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i fidget and wait for my flight to be called out. cebu pacific prides itself in being 90% on time, this is definitely part of the 10%. i entertained myself watching the tv information plugs about the philippines they show on tv, i found out that my destination, negros occidental happens to have the most number of cities compared to any province in the philippines.

the flight from mactan to bacolod is best described as the "rise and fall". barely have i gotten used to the steep ascend into the heavens when suddenly, the airplane seem to be nosediving towards the ground. yup, all of 25 minutes on air and i'm on the ground again.

bacolod though is not my destination, some friends planned a trip to lakawon island, north of bacolod city, a fifteen minute boat ride across cadiz city. cadiz is actually pretty close to bacolod but we initially missed a turn that took us in a neck breaking, butt whipping, brain jogging road until we got directions that we took the wrong turn.

we ret…

Flip Superheroes

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In the car, driving back to Cebu city from Mactan International, spied a huge billboard featuring two of the greatest super heroes of Filipino comics in a Bench spread of Richard and Raymund Gutierrez.
Captain Barbell and DARNA.
You probably thought I was referring to Super Twins.
Nope, that series is a rip-off of the Japanese manga series Sailor Moon S, just like Lupin. Even the reincarnation of Captain Barbell is based on Smallville. Only Darna remained true to her Filipino dark-haired roots. Hmmm, have to pass by the Kapusong Mamon office and collect my not so subtle attempt at plugging their TV shows.