Animal House
Waking up at 4 in the morning so I can take the early 5 am bus trip from Kabankalan, Negros to Cebu City is hard. As in really hard. Unfortunately, no airconditioned bus leaves Negros that early so I had to take the regular bus. It really did seem like a good plan.
It was an innocent enough start, few passengers, the occasional early chicken making a mad dash accross the road. Hmmm... the early chicken gets the early worm. In any case, the usual routine of picking up passengers along the way turned into something absolutely ridiculous when we first made our major stop and had to pick up a fellow who loaded up 12 bags of livestock feed on top of the bus. It took thirty minutes just to secure the bags with a rope and tie it up so it doesn't fall over when the bus hits 100 fucking crazy kilometers an hour.
From Mabinay we made our way to Bais City and stopped for some passengers waiting with a herd of goats along the road. I thought... hmmm... isn't that sweet? the family is sending off the husband before heading off for the hills with the goats. As it turned out, they loaded all 15 goats into the compartments at the bottom part of the bus. As in fifteen goats. Weeeee... the goats are going on a trip to Cebu! It took another 15 minutes to stuff bleating, yawing, hee-hawing goats in there. I vaguely thought in irritation how the goats are going to survive the stuffy four hour drive.
The pick up didn't stop there... we stopped to pick up a passenger who loaded up three huge sacks of oysters to be delivered in a classy restaurant in Mandaue (Cebu), then another passenger who loaded up three huge styrofoam boxes filled with stinking fish, then another passenger who (thankfully) threw in 4 chickens tied at the legs so they won't go running around.
Finally after spending about an hour and a half just picking up every bloody animal along the way (well, running over a couple here and there as well..) the bus ride took to the scenic mountain roads where panoramic vistas of mountains, lakes and the distant ocean greet us from unexpected curves and bends.
Did I mention Curves and Bends? Riding the bus is a great abdominal workout. You have to constantly flex your core muscles as the bus makes hair raising turns at superman speeds. I swear i heard some of the ladies scream... but on closer analysis i think i heard them shout "My haaaaaaiiiiiir...".
I didn't realize that riding the bus was also a free salon visit. I mean, you get a free slightly muddy brown foundation, and have the roaring wind blow your hair dry and stiff with matching gray highlights thrown in for good measure.
It doesn't stop there... the bus got on a roll on roll off ferry boat for a short cross of the Bais Strait to get to Liloan in Cebu. Guess what, the ferry boat captain missed his target and had to turn the effing boat around so he can make another go at it (another 10 minutes lost)
By this time I've stopped counting the minutes and was just praying to God with a fervor matching that of a pilgrim to just get me safely back in Cebu!
A five hour trip that miraculously turned into a seven hour journey. With chickens flying all over the passengers. Amen.
It was an innocent enough start, few passengers, the occasional early chicken making a mad dash accross the road. Hmmm... the early chicken gets the early worm. In any case, the usual routine of picking up passengers along the way turned into something absolutely ridiculous when we first made our major stop and had to pick up a fellow who loaded up 12 bags of livestock feed on top of the bus. It took thirty minutes just to secure the bags with a rope and tie it up so it doesn't fall over when the bus hits 100 fucking crazy kilometers an hour.
From Mabinay we made our way to Bais City and stopped for some passengers waiting with a herd of goats along the road. I thought... hmmm... isn't that sweet? the family is sending off the husband before heading off for the hills with the goats. As it turned out, they loaded all 15 goats into the compartments at the bottom part of the bus. As in fifteen goats. Weeeee... the goats are going on a trip to Cebu! It took another 15 minutes to stuff bleating, yawing, hee-hawing goats in there. I vaguely thought in irritation how the goats are going to survive the stuffy four hour drive.
The pick up didn't stop there... we stopped to pick up a passenger who loaded up three huge sacks of oysters to be delivered in a classy restaurant in Mandaue (Cebu), then another passenger who loaded up three huge styrofoam boxes filled with stinking fish, then another passenger who (thankfully) threw in 4 chickens tied at the legs so they won't go running around.
Finally after spending about an hour and a half just picking up every bloody animal along the way (well, running over a couple here and there as well..) the bus ride took to the scenic mountain roads where panoramic vistas of mountains, lakes and the distant ocean greet us from unexpected curves and bends.
Did I mention Curves and Bends? Riding the bus is a great abdominal workout. You have to constantly flex your core muscles as the bus makes hair raising turns at superman speeds. I swear i heard some of the ladies scream... but on closer analysis i think i heard them shout "My haaaaaaiiiiiir...".
I didn't realize that riding the bus was also a free salon visit. I mean, you get a free slightly muddy brown foundation, and have the roaring wind blow your hair dry and stiff with matching gray highlights thrown in for good measure.
It doesn't stop there... the bus got on a roll on roll off ferry boat for a short cross of the Bais Strait to get to Liloan in Cebu. Guess what, the ferry boat captain missed his target and had to turn the effing boat around so he can make another go at it (another 10 minutes lost)
By this time I've stopped counting the minutes and was just praying to God with a fervor matching that of a pilgrim to just get me safely back in Cebu!
A five hour trip that miraculously turned into a seven hour journey. With chickens flying all over the passengers. Amen.
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